Excellence For Today

I think God talks to me the best and the most when I’m running. I’m currently trying to reclaim my status as a runner, coming back from a hip injury that I sustained almost a year ago. Just in the last week of running outdoors, I was quickly reminded of how clear my head and heart are when I run and how easily I hear God’s voice. I always think, "Why has it been so long since I've done this?" And then I go about another mile and start struggling and things start to hurt and I remember why it's been so long. But God and I always go deep on these runs. As a single mom, I think it's the quiet, undistracted time alone, and as a former athlete, I think it's there's a significant mind, body, spirit connection that kind of gets everything back in sync when running.

This last time out, God was reminding me about the difference between “perfection” and “excellence.” I like to joke that I’m a recovering perfectionist, but in all seriousness there was a time when I really believed that I was unworthy of love if I wasn’t perfect. Well, if you’ve ever strived for it and failed, you know that perfection is unattainable. But I think all athletes that have competed on a semi-serious level struggle with this: you're only as good as your last performance.  And a lot of coaches, fans, and commentators are much too happy to point this out. In this day and age of social media and statistics for every single thing you do, you really can't avoid the evidence around you. The fear of failure can be a great motivator, as well as a horrible tormenter. It’s exhausting trying to be your own god...thinking you can take His place in all of your human perfection and be ok.

Maybe I should just call it what it is: self-reliance. I think I can do it all and don’t need help. Talk about a perfect set-up for failure. But as I’ve come to the end of myself and realize that God is calling me to something far greater than I can possibly be, do and become on my own, I’m beginning to see that excellence for today is a worthy goal. God has called me to be excellent, to do everything set before me like I’m doing it for Him. And guess what? He doesn’t need my perfection, or my self-reliance, because He can’t use either of those. What He can use though is my brokenness, my surrendered will, my teachable heart, and my humility to bring glory to His Kingdom. If all I do is strive for excellence today, I will have made my Daddy’s heart smile.